BDSM and the DD/lg Lifestyle: “Fifty Shades” of Kink

DD/lg is an acronym for "Daddy" and "little"

DD/lg is an acronym for “Daddy” and “little”

With the success of the Fifty Shades of Grey book trilogy and the upcoming movie based on the books set to be released Valentine’s Day 2015, the mass fascination with anything BDSM related is strong. Although this is hardly the first erotic novel dealing with the topic (my favorite books are the Sleeping Beauty Trilogy), it is one of the first to put the BDSM lifestyle under a microscope. First of all, there is no one way to practice BDSM, in fact there are countless books that detail the many different ways that one can practice BDSM; however safety should always be a priority when delving into any one of the lifestyles under the BDSM umbrella. Today I want to specifically discuss the DD/lg lifestyle, which can be defined as a relationship between two consenting adults where one partner is the dominant “Daddy” while the other partner takes on the submissive role of the “little”:

Please note that the DD/lg dynamic has nothing to do with pedophilia. We do not condone the acts of pedophilia and the exploitation of children in any way. Just as adults like to take on other roles in the bedroom such as nurse, pet, porn star, etc. it is all roleplay; that is the same for ageplay. The DD/lg dynamic is like any other aspect of BDSM – it is safe, sane, and consensual. Those who participate in the dynamic should be not be shamed for doing so and should not be accused of having “daddy issues”.

What DD/lg is not…

  • Gender, age, or race specific.
  • just calling your boyfriend or husband “daddy” in bed.
  • the same as sugar daddies and sugar babies.
  • a reason for a submissive to act like a brat and manipulate their Dom.
  • a way to get spoiled and give nothing in return.



When I first started calling my husband “Daddy” and experimenting with age play,  we had only been dating for a couple of years and we were both in high school. At first he thought it strange, but it just seemed to work with the power dynamic of our relationship. Now as adults, we are no longer careful to hide my title for him, as it no longer embarrasses either of us. More people are being honest about having this relationship dynamic; there’s a willingness to discuss sexuality more than ever in the news as well as social media:



With more curiosity comes more understanding and I think that it will become more common to hear a partner call his or her significant other “Daddy” in public without anyone batting an eyelash.

You can see a complete glossary of BDSM terms here.